Introvert or extrovert? Think of it as a spectrum where you will rarely be at one end or the other. Most people, researchers say, tend to be somewhere in the middle. They are called ambiverts. Outgoing introverts are certainly in that position but people rarely understand this and expect people to be either one or the other. The outgoing introvert knows this only too well. Here are 10 things that they will resonate with because life is not so simple.
1. They feel that extroversion is overdone in our society
They may have done group work at school and team work when employed, but they feel that quieter time for reflection and the ability to work by themselves should be more valued in the workplace. They cannot always work in a group or together.
2. They can be the life and soul of the party
Outgoing introverts can be chatty, exuberant, funny and great company at a party. They will be completely drained afterwards and may not want to see anyone for a few hours or days!
3. They can make excellent sales persons
Tradition has it that an extrovert is the ideal person to clinch the sale, but the outgoing introvert has a lot going for them in the sales world it seems. They know when they should keep quiet and when they should push. They are also pretty good at tuning into a client’s needs and preferences.
4. They do not enjoy proms
“Everyone shines, given the right lighting. For some, it’s a Broadway spotlight, for others, a lamplit desk”- Susan Cain author of Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking
Being forced to take part in certain rites of passage such as proms is a real turn off for many outgoing introverts. They would much prefer to stay at home and read a book.
5. They prefer social media
Social media has helped many an outgoing introvert to cope with all the shenanigans. It is sufficiently social while allowing for quiet downtime with no chatty interruptions. They do not have to move too far from their comfort zone. It’s an ideal combination – acting social and being alone!
6. They prefer to be left alone sometimes
This sometimes causes upset when they start to date. They can be chatty and great company but then they may seem to withdraw into themselves because they do not answer texts or calls. The fact is that their social batteries need recharging and this has to be done alone.
7. They don’t use their phones all the time
One thing you notice about these introverts is that they are deeply focused and they cannot flit from one chatty remark to a text or a phone call. Listening and talking are just not compatible with their deep thinking and concentration.
8. They pick and choose their social events
Going out may mean a lot of small talk and that can be pretty meaningless. Yes, they enjoy company and social outings but you can bet that they will be pretty choosy when doing so. Other social occasions are sometimes risky and tricky for them. They may go with the flow or they may appear withdrawn.
9. They value their introversion highly
Silence and moments of quiet are often regarded negatively. Yet, these qualities have led to great discoveries and advanced our civilization for centuries. The outgoing introvert regards his introversion as a great strength and is perfectly content to be that way. They get very angry when people start to imply that there is something wrong with them!
10. They find it hard to adapt
Problems arise when they are expected to be outgoing all the time and perform as if they were circus clowns. They have to do this to get a job, make friends or network. They know what society demands and expects. It is not always easy to switch on extroversion like a light.